Last night (18th August) my lovely Elaine passed away.
I am heartbroken but so thankful that she let me into her life 21 years ago, I am thankful that she will not be in any more pain. I am so thankful for the fantastic loving 21 years we spent together, especially the last four and a half years where we have spent every single day and night together travelling and having fun.
Without exception she was loved by everyone that met her, she was so special.
I knew this day would come and I thought I was prepared, but it hits you like a sledgehammer.
She would hate to see me mope and feel sorry for myself as she never did, she was positive about everything she did. Its going to be hard to carry on without her but I will always knowing that she will be watching down on me.
The little doggies were with her right to the end, they have now become even more precious, if that is possible.
I will do a picture montage at a later date, we all need to remember this special lady.
I wont blog for a while, I need some time out, it will never be the same blog without Elaine, plus the spelling and grammar are going to suffer without my editor.
Once again I cant thank the East Cheshire Hospice enough, the nurses were so upset at losing one of their favourite patients. They treated her with such dignity right to the end
Please donate to them in Elaine's memory if you can, the link is here
I cant write anymore at this time.
Thank you xxxx
Life is going to be hard now Paul without your lovely lady but as you say life goes on and Elaine will be watching over you. It’s said that time is a great healer so take your time and grieve in your own way. Our hearts, thoughts and prayers are with you at the very sad time. x
ReplyDeletePaul
ReplyDeleteThis is the dreaded post and my heart and thoughts go out to you. There are no words of comfort to add. I was privileged to have met Elaine albeit only a few times. However I will have lasting memories of her. Her warmth,laughter,positive attitude in face of enormous adversity could not do other than make you feel like life long friends.
She is now a in a better place free of pain. The hurt will be enormous but stay strong as Elaine would wish.
We are so very sorry to hear your sad news Paul. Although we only met you both briefly, it was such a pleasure to have shared a fantastic adventure with you. We will never forget Elaine's beautiful infectious smile and her friendliness. Our thoughts are with you and your family. Love Neil and Pauline nb Waterlily
ReplyDeletePaul, I know you will never stop thinking and talking about Elaine, this is how I see people live on in our lives and stay with us until it is our time to be spoken of and loved after we have gone. Look after yourself now.
ReplyDeleteWe are so sorry to read of Elaine's passing. Even though you knew it was coming, it still is such a shock to find your life torn apart. Take time to grieve, and let your friends and family into your heart too, at this sad time. And think back and remember all those 21 happy years you spend together.
ReplyDeleteRobin and Jenny, Romany Rambler
Inevitably we all know people close to us who have lost their partner, so have some idea how hard life will be for you Paul without your lovely Elaine. One friend of ours said that one of the hardest things was 'having no one to do nothing with' - I hope that makes sense. You still have your lovely dogs to help ease your pain. It will take time, but as you said Elaine would not want you to stay sad for too long. Take care of yourself and also be kind to yourself. You have a lot of good times to remember. With deepest sympathy. Jennie and Chris
ReplyDeletePaul I am sure that everyone who knew Elaine will be touched by her passing.. so very very sorry but what a extraordinary angel heaven has gained..We send all our love and strength to you.. if we can offer any assistance please let us know.Lots of Love to you Paul ...Greg and Sheila xxx
ReplyDeleteDesperately sad and our thoughts are with all of you. Hang onto those good times. XXX
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry ����
ReplyDeleteOur sincerest sympathies to you Paul. We have never met but even so...
ReplyDeleteLisa & David
NB What a Lark
Such sad news Paul, & as it has been said before you think you are prepared but how can you ever be prepared to lose someone you love so much. Elaine is no longer in pain & it must have been so hard to see her suffer, peace is with her now. Our thoughts are with you.
ReplyDeleteThinking of you.
ReplyDeleteLes and Jaq
You've been amazingly courageous in sharing your your journey with us - take your time, but know that the boating community will always be here for you. Peace to your lovely lady.
ReplyDeleteSue, nb Indigo Dream
This is the post we have been dreading; so very, very sorry Paul. With love and deepest sympathy from us both xxx
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry. You, and the dogs, are in my thoughts, as you come to terms with your new life.
ReplyDeleteMy sincere condolences to you and please take care of yourself in every way possible, just as your Elaine wants you to do.
ReplyDeleteDeepest sympathy and sincere condolences, a sad day indeed. You're in our thoughts.
ReplyDeleteWords are sadly inadequate at times such as this but please know that you are in our prayers.
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing your and Elaine's happiness through your blog.
May peace be with you.
Marian & Mike
Sincere condolences Paul. Please take care.
ReplyDeletePaul.
Paul, We have never met in person but I have 'met' you and Elaine over the last couple of years through your blog. The immense courage that both of you have shown over the last part of your journey together has been phenomenal and inspiring.
ReplyDeleteYou now have the journey to continue alone. However, you will carry her heart in your heart, as will all of the friends you have made throughout your time together, and as will your families.
I am sure you will feel alone in your grief, but what I see from the comments above and the blog posts that people have written since Elaine died, is that you are not alone in it at all. Lean on your friends and family - they want to be there for you, so let them in. And talk about her with them often.
At a dear friend's funeral I quoted this:
To bring the dead to life
Is no great magic.
Few are wholly dead:
Blow on a dead man's embers
And a live flame will start.
You will bring Elaine to life in conversations and in reminiscing, in conversations you have with her, in asking yourself how she would have tackled a problem, cooked a certain dish, handled a difficult conversation. So you are not only carrying her heart in your heart, you are carrying her in your mind.
Be gentle with yourself, Paul, and accept all the love and caring that people offer.
Our deepest sympathy, Marilyn and David (nb Waka Huia)
Marilyn has expressed my sentiments exactly. I have followed the fantastic trips and places you two have visited and enjoyed every minute too. Thankyou for sharing your journey with us.
DeleteAnn and Keith nb Oakfield
I'm so sorry to hear your sad news. Thinking of you. Sheila.
ReplyDeleteSincere condolences to you, your family and the dogs,take care of yourself. Andy and Gill
ReplyDeleteWe have followed your story since before you left Australia. How bravely, Paul, you supported Elaine throughout her prolonged illness. Words will never replace a beloved wife but may memories of happier days provide you with some comfort. Our sincere condolences, Sue and Ken, nb Cleddau
ReplyDeleteA light went out on earth, but a new star burns bright from heaven. Watching over those she loved, let's show Elaine she made a difference and live as she did - kind, generous and giving. RIP Elaine. Paul, again, deepest condolences.
ReplyDeleteBeautifully written Paul,
ReplyDeleteElaine is free now, and yet, will stand by your side forever.
Sincere condolences, to you and the family
Heth and Dave xxx
so very very sad....but she is with us all, in our memories and in our hearts....for to meet Elaine would not fail in opening your heart....you both were a great inspiration to us....Robbie and Suzie nb Swamp Frogs xxxx
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