Saturday, August 13, 2016

Nearing The End

Elaine is still in the hospice and is now very close to the end.

I have moved into the hospice full time, they have supplied me with a lovely room including all food etc. The dogs are also most welcome and sleep in the room with me at night. 

Elaine's sister has come up from Kent and is also staying at the hospice.

She is also having regular visits from her brother, nephew, stepdad, and her friends that all live local.   
It is a surreal moment with Elaine sleeping for hours on end and then suddenly she wakes and says a few words, it is a struggle for her to speak, but when she does all she is concerned about is the people around her and her two beloved little doggies.

She is ready to go and desperately want to go, amazingly she is now off the morphine and is virtually pain free which is good news. 

This photo appeared on our facebook page, it was from a wedding we attended back in Sydney in 2011.

I look like crap but Elaine is her normal gorgeous self. 

Once again thank you for all your comments, emails  and letters of support, they are so much appreciated.

As always people are asking what they can do to help, I am fine, and have plenty of support from friends, the hospice and my local publican!

But the hospice desperately need funds to survive, I cannot emphasise how much the staff have helped Elaine, never in my life have I met a group of such compassionate people.

One of the nurses came in the other day as she is going on holiday for 2 weeks, she was worried that Elaine would not be there on her return, so after she finished for the day she sat with Elaine for 45 minutes just holding her hand and talking to her.  None of this I'm on my hols so I'm out of here, just so lovely to watch.

I went a bit off track there, so yes the hospice is funded 20% by the NHS the rest has to be raised by donations etc. They need to raise £7500 each and every day to survive.

If you can spare a few bob please do, it will be so much appreciated by Elaine, myself and of course the hospice.

Here is the link

Please drop me a line if you do I would like to thank each and everyone of you.

My email is


  1. Forever strong.
    Elaine will always be with you in your heart and soul. More than just words Paul, it comes from an experience both Dave and I have shared and always will.
    Heth and Dave xxx

  2. Terribly sad to read this Paul...Lovely picture of you both, Elaine will always remain gorgeous as it comes from within her....a truly beautiful compassionate lady that I have been priveledged to briefly know...Our love and prayers with you both xxx Greg and Sheila xxx

  3. Hi Paul
    Not much I can say. You know what I went through with Valerie and it's me now fighting.
    Hold her hand gently and watch her eyes as you talk to her even when closed then you will know as hears you.
    If she wakes please tell her I'm thinking of her and who knows we might meet each other soon.
    So glad you are both in a good place surrounded by good people.

  4. I have written 4 heartfelt comments here, through tears at first, then gritting my teeth & if this doesn't work, the iPad goes out the window!
    The upshot however is this, I am so grateful that the gorgeous, gentle (& bloody funny) Elaine, who has been a part of my life since I was 12, met you Paul - oh bugger, I'm crying again now! I stopped reading your blog for a while, no idea why & Kathy reminded me - I've just spent 2 hours catching up - what a tremendous & horrendous journey you have had, but jam packed with joy & love.
    Elaine has an equally tremendous journey ahead of her & so have you darling Paul. If your journey ever seeks Aussie sunshine again then there is nowhere better than Darwin in the Dry & there will always be a bed for you here.
    Vast, huge amounts of virtual love & hugs in its way to you both, kiss Elaine for me please - I'll go before I start rambling - that is if this time it actually publishes!! Love you guys xxxx

  5. Okay, this is the fifth time I've tried to post a comment & if this doesn't work I'm sending a bloody pigeon! I have now written 4 heartfelt messages, first through tears but now through gritted teeth but the upshot is I am so bloody grateful to have met Elaine, Kathy & Jane when we started High School, we all joined Elaine's crazy but very loving family & I am equally grateful that she met you.
    I've just spent 2 hours caring up on your tremendous and horrendous journey & my overriding impression is that it has been so filled with joy and love, more than many people experience in a lifetime - just gorgeous. Elaine is now embarking on an equally tremendous journey and so my darling Paul are you. So many people love you guys, we are just two tiny additions a long way away, but if your journey ever hankers for Aussie sun, there is nowhere better than Darwin in the Dry and there will always be a bed for you here.
    So, this is my last attempt at sending this before the iPad takes flight, God I wish I was right there with you, please give Elaine a gentle kiss from me and accept a big hug for you - take care - heaps and heaps of virtual love on its way xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

  6. What is there to say except.... you are both in our thoughts.
    Elli and Mick xxxx

  7. Oh Paul there are no words. Hold tight to each other as these last precious moments will stay with you forever and keep you strong. Holding you both in our thoughts love Del & Al xxx

  8. I cannot add any more Paul other than to say that you are in our thoughts as well. Hospices really are wonderful places and I am so glad that you are both being so well looked after. How wonderful that the dogs are as welcome as the human visitors. Take care of yourself. Jennie & Chris, nb Tentatrice

  9. Everything has already been said Paul, both Kev & myself are thinking of you both. We admire you very much for a lol the love & strength you show. You have got plenty of lovely memories to hold close to your heart, Elaine has shown dignity at all times & she is truly a lovely lady. God bless you both.
    Ann & Kev xx

  10. Sorry Paul, that should have said all not. Lol, typing error!


  11. Thanks for all the lovely comments guys, its so much appreciated xxx

  12. We saw nb Caxton at the weekend and took a moment to reflect on your adventures here - I'm so sorry that it's ending too soon and so sadly. You're in our thoughts.

    Sue, nb Indigo Dream