Saturday, August 6, 2016

Difficult Blogging.

I'm finding it very difficult to blog lately, mainly because Elaine is deteriorating badly so what do I write about.

Its so difficult to watch it happen before my eyes and think how she was a few months ago.

She wants me to carry on so I will see how we go.

She has had some more lovely letters and cards from blog readers who we have never met, it is very touching.

This one was particularly lovely featuring a narrow boat and a lovely letter to accompany it.  

They have had 15 new beds delivered to the hospice, Elaine was given the first one, but the doggies wanted to check it out first. 

It really is a bells and whistles bed and at a cost of £10,000 each you would hope so. They have air mattresses that are constantly changing pressure to prevent bed sores etc and can adjust to every angle imaginable.

We have been back in the UK now for over two months and every day I have been visiting Elaine at the Christie hospital in Manchester and now the East Cheshire hospice in Macclesfield. I don't mind, I want to do it, but Elaine suggested that I have one day off and go and watch my niece showjumping near Coventry.
I wasn't keen on leaving her but her sister and brother in law where coming up from Kent so she would be in good hands and they would notify me immediately if anything untoward happened.

It was a two hour drive and I arrived at about 10,00am 

It was a fantastic day out with Kimberly and Neeko performing fantastically.

Its been a three day event with Kimberley finishing third out of the 60 entrants. 



Well done Kimmy and thanks for a great day out xxxx 


25 comments:

  1. Paul our thoughts are with you and Elaine at this sad and difficult time. If it any comfort to you both, Jenny and I send our support and we think of you both often.

    Robin & Jenny

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  2. And some more good wishes from NZ, keep blogging and sharing even though it is a difficult time, we are all with you on journey. Bernice

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  3. Glad you had a dayvout, Elaine was right. I think anyone who has been through what you are going through, knows how hard it is to watch someone deteriorate, when you can do nothing and feel so helpless, but you and Elaine have been amazing and sharing it with so many isn't easy either. We are thinking of you and send our love to you both. Xx

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  4. You are both in our hearts and minds every day.
    Love from Heth and Dave xx

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  5. Me too! I think you are doing an amazing job Paul, and I am sure your day off will have helped you so don't feel guilty about taking it. Your readers will understand when you can't blog, but we will be interested in how much Elaine enjoys her expensive bed - how much!?
    Kath (no Herbie)

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    Replies
    1. She loves her new bed, we took it out in the garden today, the old ones wouldn't adjust pressure and inclines etc unless they were hooked up to the mains. The new ones have a battery back up.
      Paul

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  6. I'm so sorry that Elaine is deteriorating so fast. You are both in my thoughts, with best wishes, Serena

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  7. Paul,
    We know there is nothing we can do to help but we think of you both daily and you are always in our prayers. We to send our love and support to you both.

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  8. Forgot to add, forget the blog Paul, Elaine is your priority now everyone will understand. Have a break from it and come back when you feel able, we'll all be here for you when you do.

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    Replies
    1. It actually takes my mind off all the crap when I do post.
      Paul xx

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  9. We think you are both amazing. Our thoughts are with you both at this difficult time. Surprised to see the dogs in the hospice. Take care both of you.

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  10. There are a lot of dogs visiting at the moment plus someone brings in a cat to see its elderly owner. It really is a great thing to do for the patients, apparently they bought a horse in once!

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  11. I've said this before but not only have you shared your journey with everyone but you have shared the most amazing love story with us all. It is so great to see the love between you two each and every day. Love to both of you from Clare & Wish xxxx

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  12. Paul and Elaine, The time you are both going through is especially tough, and Paul, it will stay in your memory as particularly special - being with each other through this ending is the best gift you can give Elaine and the most loving for both of you. You will look back on this with much pain but also you can look back on it (and see it now, for that matter) with pride. This is what a loving marriage is about - the being there in the tough times and handling it together, in your own roles.
    You are both being so courageous, and I am sure that sharing it with us does help - do feel free to scream and shout in your blog, Paul; after all, if sharing in the blog helps, then a bit of primal screaming and enraged shouting couldn't go amiss occasionally ...
    Kia kaha,
    Thinking of you, Marilyn and David nb Waka Huia

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  13. I've started to comment umpteen times over and deleted it - I don't 'have the words' nor skill to convey the sentiments behind my intention… luckily, Marilyn and David have just done it for me!
    I'd like to add though, that what perhaps you don't realise, is the continued 'good' (for want of a better expression) it does everyone reading, to be in touch with THEIR feelings and experience empathy. .. It gives us a sense of perspective! Many folk go through life on their journey, trying to brush a side emotion but sharing your strength and vulnerability is the most gracious gift from you both to "US" ... for which, we're most humbly grateful.

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    1. Thank you so much for your kind words.
      Paul

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  14. Just to say I agree with Marilyn. I just got to get my comfort/pain sorted and I will blog again. Tell it how you feel Paul. Hugs to you both.
    Les

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